Scientology Incorporated

So it’s after a gig*, and I’m sitting at the bar with another comic, and a couple of girls who thought we were the funniest guys they had ever met. Things are heating up, but I’m starting to feel a little apprehensive because it’s just too easy. When I don’t have to work at something, I always start to wonder if there’s something wrong. Either I’m about to be robbed, or there’s a flaw I haven’t noticed.



The conversation turns to Scientology. There had recently been a expose in Time magazine (and astute readers can now speculate on how long ago this was). “It’s a really evil institution,” I start, “Kind of a cross between the Mafia and Oral Roberts with just a dash of the Manson Family.”

The girl who had been getting all my attention chuckled condescendingly, “Well, I read that Kirstie Alley is a Scientologist, and I don’t think Kirstie Alley would belong to anything like that!”

Oh. There’s the flaw. She is stupid. (And probably a pre-clear TR-4)...(read more)